I had enough of feeling sluggish all the time

November 24, 2024 at 07.00

This week I had the most incredible endorphin rush. I grunted loudly, releasing every bit of pent up aggression and stress that had been sitting in my body. In one fell swoop, the mental load I was carrying, from work to parenting, was lifted. I felt pure joy pouring out of every single corner of my body. I had done it. I had finally managed to lift 75kg on my shoulders, from a weighted squat.

These are words I never thought I would say.

Weightlifting is not for women, is it? It’s for the men who like to parade around gyms, check out their bodies, measure their “gains” and obsess over their six packs. Well, that’s what women were raised to think: cardio training and group classes for the girlsweights for the boys. We were led to believe that strength training was not the “feminine” thing to do, that if we ventured over to that side of the gym we risked developing a “masculine” body that no one would find attractive.

But like many things in this world, education on the gym and training is historically sexist. One thing I’m thankful for this year is the realization that strength training can be one of the most emotionally and physically satisfying things older women can do. For me, it has been the biggest “self-care change” I’ve made in 2024.

Read Next

I am what you would call a disloyal gym goer. I’m really good at the initial stage, and I go through the beginning of every year when you’re bombarded with gym discounts, fitness books, and weight loss gurus hawking their latest wares, whether it’s some new diet plan or pill.

I always ended up ditching my new routine within a couple of months and returning to the gym every now and then when I had a big event I needed to get dressed for.

I totally understood the concept of exercise making you feel better, but it never connected with me. It felt like a chore to add to the endless list of chores we have to get done in everyday life. If there was one thing I didn’t need in my life, it was this—another task to remember to do in the midst of parenting and a busy work schedule.

But a year ago something changed in me. I had had enough of feeling sluggish all the time. It was less about weight loss and more about just feeling more like “me” again. Two kids in quick succession can do it.

It wasn’t just about the weight: despite being a confident woman, I just didn’t feel, well, strong. At the same time, I had noticed that my friend Caroline, a mother of three, had gone through a kind of metamorphosis. She had very clear changes in her body, but that wasn’t all. She stood taller, she held herself in a completely different way. She just seemed… stronger. We sat and talked and Caroline told us that she did strength training. I wanted in.

She talked me through everything, but most importantly, she told me not to be afraid of it. She told me about the joy of feeling strong. From that day, I haven’t looked back.

I’ve had wobbles where I’ve felt like none of it is worth it and that I’m wasting my time. I’ve had a couple of days where I finally learned what DOMS (delayed onset muscle soreness) meant – I could barely walk the next day after a particularly strenuous session. My friend Lee had to explain why I felt like my legs were about to fall off. I’ve had those days where everything just seemed impossible.

But you know what? It’s the first time in my life that I’ve stuck with a particular exercise for a whole year and not given up. Let me tell you why.

I feel stronger, yes. I feel healthier, yes. But it’s the sense of accomplishment of succeeding at something I never thought I could that really makes me feel happy. When I first started I laughed at heavily weighted squats – they just seemed like an impossible task I would never be able to do. But gosh, when I finally busted through 75kg squats this week, I could have cried.

We often talk about women being emotionally strong, but being physically strong adds a whole new layer that I really can’t imagine not having in my arsenal now. It is a level of power that increases mental well-being.

I have yet to reach the dizzying heights of staring at myself in the gym mirror, flexing my muscles, or parading around to show off my gains, but hey, there’s still time.

Charlene White is the presenter of ‘ITV News’ and ‘Loose Women’